Thursday, December 16, 2010

Look out Sarah Palin!

I've only seen one episode but I believe that I could give Sarah Palin's Alaska a little competition if TLC were to come hang out with me. Unlike Sarah, I was not born and bred in the place I've called home for the past 12 years. I have no claim to call it Gina Green's Iowa but a record of this southern girl's experience living on the frozen tundra might be entertaining.

Entertaining, like when I have to clear the driveway of snow. Occasionally, hubby's job has him out of town and I believe there is a direct correlation to his absence and significant snowfall. That is why I had children, specifically MALE children. Who knew they would grow up and move away and I would have to fend for myself?

So it might be entertaining to see...
  • Every new snow season when I have to remember how to run the snowblower (choke on or off to start? hold the lever thingy that turns the blade in to start or does it matter?)
  • Every new snow season when it takes me a few tries before I remember which method of clearing the driveway is most effective (side to side vs. down and back or a combination of the two).
  • The snow removal fashion show. My wardrobe consists of a strange combination of Cuddleduds, snowboarding pants left behind by one of those male children, whatever turtleneck is available, my first coat purchase after moving to Iowa--an Eddie Bauer snow jacket, accented by daughter's once owned fuzzy scarf and how many ever pairs of gloves I can fit on my hands and still have some dexterity.
My first shopping trip for a coat was overwhelming (rarely an emotion experienced by me while shopping). I never knew coats could be rated on how warm they were at 20 below or that they came with so many practical features (detachable hoods, inner pockets, zip in/out linings, etc)! Today, coat shopping is a science with base layers, outer layers and words like primaloft and triclimate. Don't get me started with Northface jacket names--it takes a linguistics degree to pronounce the various styles! But let me say that Cuddleduds is a southern girls best friend while living on the frozen tundra.

  • The snow removal strip down. I usually over-dress and start pulling off auxiliary clothing as I get overheated from the exertion.
  • Every Fall when I forget to put out those reflective markers telling me where the driveway and walkways end and begin. Really, you think after 12 years, I would remember.
  • But the most entertaining sight to see is snow blowing into the wind when I end up with a hair style more firmly in place than Freeze It Mega Freeze hairspray can provide
It's this time of year that makes me miss my native land of Texas and Arkansas where one may still be mowing the grass, sweeping the porch, or wearing jackets that are rated on their cuteness factor instead of wind chill factor.

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